Posted on

Pohon dan Rumputnya, Buku dan Peernya

Suatu hari setelah si bungsu berbuat sesuatu yang ngeseliiin banget dan bikin ngurut dada.

Si Bunda: “Hmh..capeek! Percuma ngasuh anak sendiri, dengan tangan sendiri dari sejak lahir, hasilnya kaya begitu tuh, mendingan kaya anaknya si A, B ato C aja deh taro di pesantren aja pulangin ke Indonesia, biar bener.”
Suaminya si bunda: “Are you sure Mom?” Kalau kita nanam pohon kan pasti akan tumbuh rumput, ya kewajiban kita dong untuk mencabuti rumput tersebut.”
Continue reading “Pohon dan Rumputnya, Buku dan Peernya”

Posted on

Expectations, Reality and Dream

“Expectations can kill you, take a distance from the world, from your monkey mind, no attachment. Just be nothing..be zero… just pray, wait and give it all to the Almighty. Let God plays His scenario and keep our mind zero, because most of the time what make us suffer is our mind! “

I am a dreamer, and I put a lot of effort to achieve it. Usually I make several plans A, B, C, D, and then I feel safe and comfort. By the same time, consciously or not I also make some expectations, even create imagination in my mind what would happen with plan A, B, C, D, and what is the worst case.
Continue reading “Expectations, Reality and Dream”

Posted on

Happiness in marriage, fight for it

“Don’t ever feel alone. If you are sad, I am sad. If you are sick, I am also sick. We are going through all of this together. You are not alone…I won’t let you alone. Trust me… I’ll be with you…forever…”

I felt like I was drowning. I couldn’t see anything. Dark, everywhere was dark. My tears were hovering in my eyes and I yelled out: Why? Why? Why it seems that I don’t deserve to be happy. Where are You my Lord? Just watching me in pain like this? Just standing there and smiling at me from a distance? Why? What? What again that am I supposed to learn? Why it seems that life is just like jumping from one pain to another? Don’t I deserve to be happy? hiks hiks. I am tired! And you, just leave me alone! You are busy, the children either. They are growing up, they have their own life and so do you. And I? I don’t know where am I. Just go back to work and leave me alone! Hiks hiks… I bursted into tears. Frozen.
Continue reading “Happiness in marriage, fight for it”

Posted on

Percakapan Dua Insan, Ketika Badai Datang

Badai itu datang lagi. Entah mengapa, datangnya selalu menjelang musim semi, menjelang umurku bertambah satu lagi. Dan sang badai tentu saja, selalu memporak porandakan hati. Harus seperti itu supaya bisa naik kelas lebih tinggi, kata pak Kyai. Badai, angin putting beliungnya menderu-deru di hati. Gelungan ombaknya menggoyah-goyahkan ketetapan hati. Tampang dilipat-lipat, mulut terkunci lekat. Tak hendak beranjak, maunya hanya bergelung selimut menutup tubuh rapat-rapat. Kalau bisa rasanya esok hari dunia ini tak perlu ada lagi.
Continue reading “Percakapan Dua Insan, Ketika Badai Datang”